WARNING: This is not a “feel good” post.
Some days I just feel like a huge failure!
My kids don’t listen to me. My thirteen year old won’t come out of her room. My ten year old wants to play video games 24 hours a day. My seven year old is whiny. My 2 year old won’t sleep through the night. The baby has started throwing, kicking, and hitting everything in sight and I’m exhausted!
What am I doing wrong on these days? I don’t wake up thinking, “Today, I’m going to be a horrible parent.” I usually wake up very happy to start the day with my kids. But, some days life is just a mess!
My house is a mess. There are toys all over the floor. The laundry is piled upon every available couch, chair, and bed. I haven’t showered in over 24 hours. My hair is pulled into a greasy pony tail and I probably smell. I feel so defeated! If only, I could wake up a little earlier, maybe then I could shower daily. Only problem with that, I AM TIRED! I need more sleep! So, greasy and smelly I’ll stay.
I recently had a talk with a very sweet friend about how I’m happy as long as my kids are happy. The truth is that I AM happy as long as they are happy, but I just would like a few small things to go my way for once.
List of things I’d like to go my way…
1. No arguing… THIS IS HUGE! I am SO TIRED of my seven year old and ten year old bickering at each other! I want to tie them to each other or make them walk around in the same oversized shirt until they can learn to just GET ALONG! (side note: I have NOT done this… but I’ve thought about it! ha ha!)
2. A “less-messy” house. I’m not a protectionist. I don’t expect everything to be spotless, but just a little less mess would really make my day!
3. Getting to talk to my soldier at least once a day. THIS WOULD BE HUGE! I feel so rejuvenated after talking with him and my life just seems perfect after I’ve reconnected with my love.
4. Money to spare. There just never seems to be enough for the “extras.” I know many people feel this way, maybe all of us and I know how truly truly BLESSED we are… I’m just saying it would be nice.
So, there you have it. I’m real. I don’t have it all figured out. Some days are hard. Sometimes I want to go crawl into my bed and pull the covers over my head and just cry. Some days I feel like a huge failure!