Losing Little Man after 16 months of being his mommy was a huge loss. It was without question the biggest loss of my life thus far. I think about him all of the time and I worry about him! Worry is my sin. I know it’s not right! I know that I have to work on it, but this weekend I figured out a way to “deal” with it. I worked! I worked my booty off! I raked TONS of leaves, filling the wheelbarrow over 10 times! I did 11 loads of laundry, I washed 3 loads of dishes, I cleaned 3 toilets, vacuumed the entire house, and didn’t sit down each night until I couldn’t do anymore! And, guess what? It worked! I worked my worries away! I didn’t have time during all of that to sit and worry about my Little Man. Occasionally, a sweet memory would pop into my head and I would think to myself, “oh, I remember when Little Man did that,” or “he would have loved helping me with this.” It was enjoyable to think about him like that. Not worry, but wonder at how blessed I was to have been his mommy for all of that time! Today, I prayed he is settling into his new life comfortably. I prayed that he is safe and happy and well taken care of. I prayed for peace in his little heart and that he isn’t hurting. I prayed that one day I will get to hear that he is doing okay!
You remain in my prayers!
Good for you for getting all that work done. I’m so sorry to hear about Little Man not being with you.