Waiting to feel whole again

I’m waiting, waiting to feel whole again.  For sixteen months we were a family of seven.  My husband and I had two sons and three daughters.  Days were busy, nights were crazy.  We were happy!  Now, life is just, different.  I try to enjoy the peace in the house.  Don’t get me wrong, we still have a toddler, so it’s still crazy, but there are lots of calm and peaceful moments too.  Those are the moments, I can’t get used to.  Then there are the tender little hearts and their questions.  I can’t get used to answering my children’s questions of why.  “Why did God allow this mama?”  “If God knows everything, He knew we would love him and that he would be totally connected to us, but then that he’d have to leave, why did God do that, mama?”  

We miss our Little Man every day!  Every single day.  

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