Saying “goodbye” to The Twins

• I took J and K to their mama’s house today along with all of their worldly possessions.  I hugged them, kissed the tops of their sweet smelling heads and said, “goodbye.”  Then, I drove away and bawled my eyes out.  I could feel my heart breaking.  I love those precious boys!  Being their foster mama has been one huge joy! They are in loving hands though.  Their mama fought for them!  She did everything anyone ever asked her to do to get her boys back.  This was a foster care success story!  I’m blessed to have been a part of keeping this family together.  God is so good! 

They play together even when they could play with anyone else!

The Twins and Baby Girl go to the same preschool where I also work two days a week.  It’s fun because from my classroom window I can look outside and “spy” on them while they are on the playground.  It’s free time and there are three classes full of friends they could play with, but over the past few weeks when I look outside they are always together!  They really are like triplets now.  Baby Girl is only a few months older than K and J, so I really do have three three-year olds, “foster triplets.” 

It makes my heart so happy to look out the window and see that even though they could literally play with anyone else, they still play with each other! 

They have a loving mama

I’m sitting in a coffe shop drinking coffee, Baby Girl is having a hot cocoa.  We just dropped the twins off for a family visit at their mama’s house.  I took some of the twins’ things to her house today.  Reunification should happen at court next month.  I feel good about it this time!  I’m happy when I get to take the twins to see their mama.  She is good with them.  She cares about them.  She wants to do better than she ever has for them and she has told me so.  She has established an appropriate residence.  She has a job, a vehicle, and wants to do this!  She is different from what I’m used to being a foster parent.  I’m so happy for the boys!  I’m so happy for their mama.  

Christmas with The Twins

Christmas with the twins was amazing.  I loved watching them light up after seeing their Christmas gifts. I sat for an hour Christmas morning watching them ride in circles on their new Power Wheel ATV’s.  They were so happy!  But, these little ones really are just always very happy little boys.  They are well adjusted and joyful children.  I love being their foster mama.  They are a joy!  

The twins have adjusted fabulously!

The twins are amazing!  God has protected their little hearts for sure!  They are loving, kind, sensitive, playful, compassionate children. They play well with Baby Girl.  They attend school, church, and outings with our family and have absolutely no behavior problems when out in public.  They are pretty much the most precious little boys on the planet as far as I am concerned.  

I love them already! It is crazy how fast the love comes in foster care.  But, I love them and they already have a piece of my heart!  

Picking up The Twins

The day I went to pick up The Twins was so cold and rainy.  The weather was just bad that day.  Baby Girl and I loaded up in the truck, put the address I was given into the GPS and headed out.  First, we went to their previous foster home to pick up their belongings and then we followed their social worker to the daycare they had attended since entering foster care just one month prior.  The social worker unloaded the carseats, handed them to me and went inside to get The Twins.  I loaded the much too large and completely inappropriate (for three year olds) booster seats into my truck.  I didn’t say anything to the social worker about the seats because I was just meeting this woman.  If she was the one who bought the boys these seats, I didn’t want to offend her by saying they weren’t correct, so I just stayed silent.  She came out of the daycare with two of the most precious little boys that I have ever seen.  Identical twins, K and J walked outside in the cold with their little matching jackets on and I bent down to meet them.  “Hi, I’m Miss B,” I said.  “Oh, they’re going to call you mama,” the social worker interrupted.  “They call all women ‘mama’ and all men ‘daddy.”  “They can call me whatever they want,” I replied.  In my mind, I knew this wasn’t a good sign.  It isn’t normal for a child to use those words for anyone, but their immediate and most special caregiver.  T never called me, “mama” and he was with me for seven months.  The twins are younger than T, but still I knew this couldn’t be a good sign of attachment to their parents.  I picked the boys up one at a time and put them into their car seats.  The social worker told me she would be in touch with me later in the week and she drove away.

After everyone was all buckled, I got into the driver’s seat and looked in my rear view mirror.  Three three-year olds looked back at me.  Baby Girl, K and J were all buckled and ready to go.  Was I?  Could I do this?  Three children under three years old is a lot… but yes I knew I could!  God had given me this blessing and we were going to be fine.  I turned around and said, “Everyone ready to go home?”  K looked at me with a HUGE smile on his face and said to me clear as day, “We’re your babies now Mama!”  My heart both sank and broke at the same time.  They just met me.  They haven’t been in my car for two minutes and they’re already calling me, “mama.”

Sweet precious babies.  My sweet little twins!

 

 

 

Twins

I’ve been praying for years… years I’ve been praying.  My heart is for the children that I believe God will bring into our lives to minister to through foster care and so when we got military orders to move, my heart broke.  It broke because we are foster parents and for years we have fostered precious little souls that each have a piece of my heart.  Little Man, Baby Girl, Sad Eyes, T, and The Baby all have a piece of me.  Baby Girl’s adoption last year was one of the greatest days of my life!  Being her forever mommy is one of my happiest joys!  My heart still feels there are little loves that need a mommy to take care of them and that I am that mommy.  So, when we got orders I was devastated.  We are not scheduled to move until next June, but still I called our agency to let them know the military’s plans to move our family.  All parties agreed that we should put our home on hold except for respite.  I grieved.  I grieved not being able to do what I truly believe God has called me to do.  But, I started packing away my baby things, my foster care items went into labeled boxes to be put into storage.

Then, tonight at 8:30 pm we got “THE CALL!”  Everyone in the foster care community knows this call.  It starts with looking down at your caller ID and seeing your social worker’s phone number.  Your heart starts to beat fast.  You get really excited!  Tonight was no different.  Two little boys need us, twin three year old boys.  We should get to welcome them into our home this Monday if all goes as planned.  We will have them for a short time, probably two months.  Their mother is working her case plan and is seeming to be doing really well, so this should be a short placement, but we are still very excited.  I can’t wait to meet the two little boys who will be part of our family for a short time.  I can’t wait til Monday!

 

 

3 years ago today…

3 years ago on this date at 9:00 p.m. an unknown car pulled into our driveway. Three social workers and two of the most beautiful babies that I had ever laid eyes on were in it. We RAN to the car to welcome them into our home and I can honestly tell you without a shadow of a doubt that my life has NEVER been the same. I don’t EVER want to go back to the person I was before meeting my angels. They changed my view on everything! Jesus used two little babies to show me my own faults, where I needed to be humbled, where I needed more patience, and what was truly important in life. 16 months flew by and then I was faced with my worst fear (losing Little Man). I had told God I could not survive it, that He would have to change the circumstances because my heart wouldn’t be able to take it. God taught me something again… that JOY comes in the morning after grief and suffering. He taught me I could survive my worst day ever because I did. Now, I just pray pray pray for the little boy, I once called my son. Our babies were and are gifts from GOD! Today, one of those babies is my forever daughter! Baby Girl fills our house with JOY! She is growing into a very independent, loving, sensitive, daughter and sister. When I am asked about what I am most thankful for this year it is HER! She is our answer to YEARS of prayer. Thank you Lord JESUS for November 13th, three years ago. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

“The Lord has done great things for us,
and we are filled with joy.” Psalm 126:3

The Pumpkin Patch

We went to the Pumpkin Patch today.  It is a tradition.  We go every year.  We take hay rides, cut pumpkins off the vine and eat homemade farm goodies.  It’s the best!  

This year, as we walked through the petting zoo and as I watched the kids enter the corn maze, I reflected on years past.  Every year for the last three years we have taken different groups of kids to the Pumpkin Patch.  Every year we have made different memories, but the goal has been the same.  We go to spend time with each other.  We go to play and have fun.  We go to bond and reconnect.  And every year I love it!

Our home is temporarily closed.

As happens with Army life, we may have to move.  Because of this, we had to temporarily close our home to new foster placements.  We had to put a hault on our plans to hopefully adopt again soon.  Now, we wait.  Will we indeed be moving next spring?  Where will the Army send us?  

One thing is FOR SURE.  I am praising GOD that Baby Girl is our’s always and forever!  I NEVER would have left this state without her!  Now, that isn’t even a worry! She goes where we go!